Personal boundaries are:
Personal boundaries are guidelines, rules or limits that a person creates to identify reasonable, safe, and permissible ways for other people to behave towards them and how they will respond when someone passes those limits.
– Ann C. James, Founder of Intimacy Coordinators of Color
Boundaries are NOT requests (“Please don’t yell”) or ultimatums (“If they yell again, I quit”). They are limits you set to protect yourself (“If there is yelling, I will walk out of the room”).
Boundaries can change over time as you gain more information. You can relax your boundaries as you build trust. You can also set more or firmer boundaries to keep yourself safe. All these choices are okay and allowed.
If someone questions your boundaries or bullies you to change them, that is COERCION, not consent.
Learn about sharing your boundaries during a Boundaries Check-In
